The medium was very expensive, but he’d like to make contact with his old schoolfriend.
He had greatly admired his old chum and felt the cost was worth seeing how he was going. They were teenagers when they had spent time together. Now, getting on in life himself and recently returning from abroad he had learned that the man was dead. He had made an appointment to visit a well-known spiritualist; she was considered to be the best. Because he had lost touch after leaving school as a result of his parents moving to another country, he was aware that it may be difficult to locate him in the hereafter. This would be made even more challenging by the fact that he couldn’t remember his name, only his nickname, ‘stinky’. He knew that he had entered politics as a young man, but that was about all.
Seated across from the seer, he began by explaining how little he had to go on. “I do hope it’s possible to contact him,” he said.
“We can only try,” she said, with a wrinkled smile. “Can you describe him?”
“I can, but only as a boy, of course.”
“No matter. Tell me what you can.”
“Well, he was quite short and a little bit chubby, he had curly hair that was ginger when I knew him.”
She nodded. “OK. His nickname was Stinky, you say?”
“Yes, it rather suited him.”
The medium closed her eyes and fell silent for several long minutes, before opening them. “Not very successful, I’m afraid. I’ve been communicating with parties on the other side and they don’t seem to have a record of him. I was rather taking it for granted that your friend was upstanding. Are you sure he went to heaven?”
“I… I haven’t really thought about… you know, that side of it.”
All right; although I prefer not, since we’ve come this far, I’ll contact the other place.” With that she went into what looked like a trance for even longer this time. Finally, she woke abruptly, looking most upset.

Are you OK? he asked. She grabbed a tissue and blew her nose. “Yes,” she said. “They were even more rude this time. Their language was disgusting.”
“What did they say?”
“When I said he became a politician, they complained that it would be like looking for a needle in a haystack. Even, the nickname didn’t help. They say they get a lot of them down there…”
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