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The lodger drove home after an exhausting day.

He had been in the house for an hour before realising that his keys were missing. He wandered into the front room and found his landlord lounging with his feet up reading the paper, as usual.

“Dam it!” he said as he entered.

“What?” came the disinterested reply.

“I can’t find my keys.”

“Bet they’re somewhere.”

“Eh?”

“Somewhere, you know, wherever you lost them.”

The lodger made an effort not to get annoyed. At the end of the day, the man was his landlord.

“Yeah, right. You’re probably right. Anyway, happy birthday!”

The other didn’t look up, but mumbled, “Thanks.”

The lodger stood patting his pockets. “They have to be here, somewhere,” he whispered to himself.

The other said, “They’ll turn up when they’re good and ready.”

“They have to. All my keys are on it.” He sat down. “They have to be in the house somewhere. I know I had them in my hand when I came through the front door.”

The other said “You’ll have to go back to wherever you’ve been since you came in.”

“I know, but I’ve just about been in and out of every room in the house since I got home.”

“They’ll turn up,” the landlord repeated. He turned a page and went back to his reading.

“Sorry, I wanted to give you your present before going to my room.”

“Present?”

“Sure, I picked it up on the way home. Sorry, it’s locked in the boot.”

The landlord jumped up. “Did you make a coffee when you got in?”

“Yes. Why?” he said, shaking his head. “I just don’t know what I’m going to do.”

“I do. We’ll go room to room. Let’s start in the kitchen.”